10 rule for dating my teenage daughter
This is a thinking error—a complete cognitive distortion that you shouldn’t accept as a parent. In effect, you are saying: “You’ve had 18 years to learn how to make it on your own. Whatever you’ve chosen not to learn or chosen not to do over those 18 years, you’re going to have to pay a price for that now.” The bottom line is, sometimes kids have to start out small.Parents need to say to older kids: “You made your choices in high school, and now if you want to better yourself, you’re going to have to go to school at night. There’s no shame in that, and you have to make that very clear.Parents feel they have to take care of their kids, whether they are 9 or 19 years old.
Just like you can have a spelling error, and misspell a word, you can have a thinking error in which you misread life’s problems and come out with the wrong solutions.At 16, they’re starting to drive, they’re often getting money on their own, and they’re around people with drugs.On the surface, they may seem much more independent and responsible, but often they are simply better able to put their parents off and hide what’s really going on with them.And when things come out wrong, these kids often view themselves as victims.You’ll hear them saying things like: “It’s not my fault.” “I couldn’t help it.” “I only stayed out an hour late and you want to punish me?